DUX OF BEERWAH

hmm..makes me wonder. i was crowned Dux of Beerwah...should i stop crowing
about this?

The Venerable Bede, in the eighth century, was also rightly considered the
most learned man in Europe; his idea of a hard problem was determining the
date of Easter. It was becoming progressively easier to become the most
learned Man of one's time
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NO - Beerwah is way ahead of its time in this regard
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"WE'LL ALL BE ROONED"

first things first...kill as many people as you like, but we want our money.

  With a war on Iraq becoming more likely, farmers are demanding a guarantee
they will not lose money as they did in the previous Gulf war.
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who hasnt had enough of whingeing farmers?

when there is drought cattle prices must rise due to the decimation of the
herds. farmers get drought relief.
when rain the drought breaks many remaining cattle drown so prices must
rise. farmers get flood aid.
after the floods ease farmers must divert herds from the market to rebuild
stocks, so prices rise. farmers get emergency aid for locust plagues.
when the herds are built up and the lands fertile, farmers export quality
beef overseas, so domestic prices rise. farmers get export concessions and
fuel tax relief.

WAR PROFITEERING

i maybe coming down to beerwah to fix up the price board in the sierra. 
hope i make it.
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War profiteering?
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called off. the orc meter is reading red hot. they are using the mist and
rain as cover to advance their positions.  we can thank our luck stars the
troll sees no reason to make an alliance with them.
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let's hope they don't make it to the sierra before the price rise.
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REDCLIFFE

This pic proves you were up to no good at Redcliffe. here you are consorting 
with known fisherman & women of ill repute.

MADDOCKVILLE

Maddockville: once a thriving centre of industry, Maddockville has become a 
rustbelt town in recent years, collapsing into obscurity along with Campbellville.  
the town once boasted 14 pubs and 4 theatres, now only one pub
remans and the last theatre was recast into a market place for the residents to 
trade and pawn their remaining belongings for food. bandits roam the street at 
night, and it is said even rowdy dawson stays clear during the
pall of darkness. the best left long ago. the worst keep cming back and bring 
their own kind with them.  a town to be avoided at all costs; don't plan on 
breaking down here.
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CAMPBELLVILLE DEVELOPMENTS INC PROSPECTUS

dear Shareholder,

Im pleased to report that plans for La Coochina marina are now well underway. 
a feasibility study has been conducted of the fishing zones and waterskiing
pathways [ably assisted by two of my nephews here] and also assays of soil
quality in the proposed building area [used a shovel for this, soil looks
pretty clayish].
after this work there is still 2 million left over from the 10 million
initial public raising [which you, dear shareholder, contributed] so i
intend to conduct further research on ClubMed architectural planning
procedures by visiting several sites in the Bahamas, the French Riviera and
Abu-Dabi. will pen a report on my return.

be well
Finneas Glickstein
chairman
La Coochina Develpments inc.
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i have friends in low places in Abu-Dabi. they will look you up.